What do all these things have in common? Your kids are extremely likely to be exposed to them, regardless of your income level, race, sanitary practices, or religious affiliation. But the good news is, it’s a perfect time to use this newfound downtime during the pandemic to take the time to look through every photo inside every app, and every conversation on your child’s phone; their permanent digital reputation and compliance with the law is an important issue that needs to be addressed with any child having a personal device.  More time at home should not equal more time on technology due to exponential risk of neurological disruptions, porn, and predators.

Everyone is becoming educated on proactive steps to protect themselves AND others from Coronavirus based on CDC warnings and guidelines. But, as parents, why have we not been vigilant about the same CDC warning and guidelines (for years now) about screen time of only 1-2 hours a day for youth and none under age two? Even though screen time is not a virus, it still has well documented long term negative health consequences. It’s time to know better and DO better.

When kids are in elementary school, it’s standard practice to keep a keen eye out for those pesky white bugs that seem to come out of nowhere and cause a lot of household stress to eradicate. However, when it comes to kids and sexually explicit photos, most parents are reluctant to talk about it or vigilantly monitor devices for inappropriate bullying, sexting, or even child porn—and almost ALL kids are going to come into contact with all forms of it, many middle and high school students now sharing and receiving on a regular basis unbeknownst to their parents.

“Unfortunately, we´ve also seen a historic rise in the distribution of child pornography, in the number of images being shared online, and in the level of violence associated with child exploitation and sexual abuse crimes. Tragically, the only place we´ve seen a decrease is in the age of victims. This is – quite simply – unacceptable.”

-Attorney General Eric Holder Jr. speaks at the National Strategy Conference on Combating Child Exploitation in San Jose, California, May 19, 2011.

So, what’s the big deal with some naked photos? A LOT, as skillfully documented by @protectyoungminds and it is even more important than ever to discuss this taboo topic with friends and kids of all ages. Coronavirus is deadly, yes, that’s a very big deal and many resources are devoted to stopping the spread. Lice seems like a big deal when it is spreading throughout your kid’s school, and it’s an endless topic of conversation. Businesses such as The Hair Fairies have even made a sustainable practice of helping parents treat the infestations! But who is there to help you monitor your kid’s phones? There are a lot of great resources online, and the team at Screen Time Clinic is here to empower parents to make a difference.

But how often do parents you know actually TALK to each other about what types of inappropriate photos are spreading through their school from kid to kid without anyone intervening? Parents all too often don’t even know what inappropriate photos their own kids are receiving and take no accountability for the content of what they are sending. Most parents don’t even know how to start monitoring even when they suspect there is a problem. There are many local and online resources like those from @ScreenTimeClinic devoted to helping parents monitor and reduce risky screen time use—but the parental excuses to turn a blind eye persist. But they don’t need to! Talk about it to your kids, talk about it to your friends, and get support cleaning up your kids digital reputation.

Many parents claim their child would never do such a thing, or that they “raised them better than that”—but just like lice and Covid-19, child porn knows no social boundaries. Still other parents flat out say they don’t WANT to know what their son or daughter is sending/posting/viewing. They know it “probably crosses the line” but are too busy or too tired to address it. And then others, time and time again, KNOW that their child is violating the law by sending sexually explicit photos, but allow them to remain in possession of their phone anyways. As if taking a phone away will do more damage to their social life than having an indelible online record of sending or receiving inappropriate content. Parents, kids don’t NEED phones. They need their parents to be parents.

Sexually explicit photos of anyone under the age of 18 is a felony to send or receive, even if it is consensual! Parents are legally liable for their children! Teens are known to have poor judgment and self-control issues since their frontal cortex for reasoning and impulse control isn’t developed until their mid 20’s. Children are not given guns, drugs, alcohol, or even keys to a car without strict adherence to the law. Yet somehow child porn among our youth runs rampant like an unstoppable virus because most parents still refuse to protect their children’s minds, habits, and permanent online reputation.

There is NO privacy online, every photo your child has viewed, sent, or received is distributed and logged in the dark web and viewed by many unintended people. Even though it may disappear from SnapChat or deleted from phones and apps, predators and digital reputation monitoring & reporting companies can see EVERYTHING. FOREVER.

Time to wake up, parents. If your kids aren’t cooperative with constant monitoring and restricting of risky apps and sites, they should not have physical access to technology. There is NO PRIVACY. Not to you as a parent, not to the world. Don’t let your kids fool you, pressure you, deceive you, or guilt trip you. They are masters of manipulation but newbies of self-limiting. Use the precious time you have with your kids wisely and take proactive steps to limit and continually monitor what they are doing. It takes work, but it’s worth it!

There is no “trust” to be earned or given. Online predators and inappropriate messaging by peers is a real and constant risk. The only thing you can trust is that if you are not diligently monitoring your child’s content and online persona, someone else definitely is…and permanently recording it. Contact @ScreenTimeClinic to get personalized FREE support to learn how to start turning your teen’s questionable online behavior into mindful curated content.

And finally, a special note about recent COVID-19 at La Jolla High School in California– Coronavirus AND a LOT of child porn has been confirmed from MULTIPLE sources. Parents. Keep your kids home… And check their phones– deleted photos, private photos, SnapChat conversations, Instagram direct messages, TicTok– ALL of it. Hold kids accountable for actions online and in person. Girls sending to boys and boys sending it to others. Felony possession and distribution for all involved at the worst, demeaning and unethical at the best. Time to wake up and help the clean up. Trust does not apply to technology for minors lacking impulse control and easily manipulated online.